The girl who cried ambulance

I’ve been struggling really badly with my anxiety lately. I’ve mostly gotten it under control the last 6 years but it’s coming back with a vengeance. In the last month alone, I’ve called emergency services 3 times- including tonight. I live rurally and it takes them 20 or so to get to me but I’m incredible embarrassed. I managed to call them off twice before they got here but the last time, they send the fire department to hang out with me until the paramedics could get there. I genuinely thought I was dying all 3 times. My heart rate must’ve been in the 170s. I felt so incredibly nauseas. I just woke up out of a dead sleep freaking out. This is my hell. I’m so afraid they’re not going to take me seriously the day I really need them.